Guest Post

The Mature Masculine by Boysen Hodgson

He cleans up after himself.

He cleans up the planet.

He is a role model for young men.

He is rigorously honest and fiercely optimistic.

He holds himself accountable.

He knows what he feels.

He knows how to cry and he lets it go.

He knows how to rage without hurting others.

He knows how to fear and how to keep moving.

He seeks self-mastery. He’s let go of childish shame.

He feels guilty when he’s done something wrong.

He is kind to men, kind to women, kind to children.

He teaches others how to be kind.

He says he’s sorry.

He stopped blaming women or his parents or men for his pain years ago.

He stopped letting his defenses ruin his relationships.

He stopped letting his penis run his life.

He has enough self respect to tell the truth.

He creates intimacy and trust with his actions.

He has men that he trusts and that he turns to for support.

He knows how to roll with it.

He knows how to make it happen.

He knows how to listen from the core of his being.

He’s not afraid to get dirty.

He’s ready to confront his own limitations.

He has high expectations for himself and for those he connects with.

He looks for ways to serve others.

He knows he is an individual.

He knows that we are all one.

He knows he is an animal and a part of nature.

He knows his spirit and his connection to something greater.

He knows that the future generations are watching his actions.

He builds communities where people are respected and valued.

He takes responsibility for himself and is willing to be his brother’s keeper.

He knows his higher purpose.

He loves with fierceness.

He laughs with abandon, because he gets the joke.

This is the Mature Masculine – it is the redefinition of masculinity for the 21st century.

By no means is this list complete.

Take a risk and come to the New Warrior Training Adventure.

We help men grow.

Because the world needs grown up men.

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3 Responses to Guest Post

  1. Jussi DancingBear says:

    Interesting list… but it sounds to me like another defintion of the ideal man… I rejoiced in the earlier post that abandoned that idea in favor of letting each man find his own fullness of being…? For some, it may look like the above list… for others, it may look very different… To me, what it looks like doesn’t matter… What does matteer is digging deeper and deeper and finding it, even if it is one grain of sand at a time…
    Honoring the beingness,

    • davidcates says:

      Happy digging, Jussi! I welcome all voices and perspectives here. Lists, not lists, ideal, unique… The more, the merrier!

  2. That list is impressive and may be right for you, Boysen, but it does not describe my masculinity. It is a very ‘soft’ list that would create difficulties for many men, where’s the focus, the presence, the certainty, the directedness? We all make our own masculinity based on our personalities and life experience. We seek what is in us and we feel it deeply. FOr me it’s more about knowing myself and living that truth.